I get no respect!!!!!!

This morning on the Interstate,
I looked over to my left and there was a


Woman

In a brand new
Cadillac

Doing 65 mph


With her
Face up next to her
Rear view mirror

Putting on her eyeliner.

I looked away
For a couple seconds...

to continue shaving

And when I looked back she was
Halfway over in my lane,


Still working on that makeup.

As a man,
I don't scare easily.

But she scared me so much;
I dropped

My electric shaver

Which knocked

The donut
Out of my other hand.

In all The confusion of trying
To straighten out the car

Using my knees against
The steering wheel,

It knocked
My Cell Phone
Away from my ear


Which fell

Into the coffee

Between my legs!

Splashed,

And burned

Big Jim and the Twins,

Ruined the damn phone,

Soaked my trousers,

And disconnected an
Important call.

Damn women drivers!

now he's having a bad hair day